On the first day of every year we make resolutions that will improve our lives, and maybe the lives of our family and friends. The majority of people don't follow through with their resolutions, some people don't even make it past the first week. Lose weight, stop smoking, quit drinking, stop dating unavailable men, stop dating high-maintenance women... you've heard them all before. I usually don't make a resolution because I'm perfect just as I am (and I certainly don't resolve to be more humble in 2008) but this year I think I will make several resolutions. It's going to be my little science expiriment.
Resolution 1: Perfect my air guitar routine in bars. This seems to make a number of people happy, so why not?
Resolution 2: Sing more on the subway. A few weeks ago my friends and I were intoxicated and singing Christmas carols on a subway to Brooklyn. You'd be surprised the amount of cheer you can spread by caroling. And once you have everyone caroling (even the homeless guy that was asleep) you can break in to "Owner of a lonely heart", it's a classic.
Resolution 3: Save money. So far this is the LEAST realistic of the lot, since it will undoubtedly cost a lot of money to drink enough to follow through with resolutions 1 and 2. But since I'm now officially in my late 20's, I should probably re-open my savings account. I actually had more money in my savings when I was 16 than I do now. Before you comment with lectures on being fiscally responsible, I'd like you to know I look super cute in my new boots.
Resolution 4: Stop watching Lifetime television & romanctic comedies on Sundays. Lifetime tv makes me think that every man is a woman beater or a murderer. Romantic comedies give me unrealistic expectations of the type of men that are out there. You can see how this could get confusing...
Now that I'm thinking about it, I could go on and on with resolutions. I think we would all be better off if we just resolved to be nicer people year after year. (uh-oh...sarcasm quickly being replaced with optimism!) I'm suddenly feeling very positive about 2008. I'm going to turn off this Lifetime movie (I said I would stop watching on Sundays, I never said anything about holidays) and spread a little cheer to my friends.
3 comments:
What about letting old ladies use the subway pole as a stripper pole for as long as they want? That's one of mine.
Oh and stop telling random dudes in Duane Reade that they look like Bobby Flay.
I do not recall Christmas carols from that subway ride, but i do recall a certain homeless man going "tap tap tappy, tap tap tappy"
Resolutions? My resolution is to meet a guy who wants to hook up with me more than once.... that is kind of more of a goal, than a resolution, but I'm gonna reach in 2008.
Post a Comment